The Exchange of Gifts 礼尚往来
A: When offered a gift, a Chinese person will usually say “No, no, I can’t take it.” Even after he takes it, he does not always open it. On the contrary, a Westerner will take the gift with appreciation and open it immediately.
B: You know why? We Chinese believe that only a valuable gift is presentable and can best convey feelings. This is why Chinese people often use precious or expensive items as gifts. During the Mid Autumn Festival or the Moon Festival, people will buy well-packaged, high-quality moon cakes for gifts and keep the ordinary ones for their own consumption. Because gifts are usually valuable items, people are reluctant to receive them out of consideration for the person who offers them.
A: Really? I never thought of that.
B: Westerners are different. For them, gifts are an expression of appreciation and don’t have to be very expensive. So, in receiving a souvenir, it is very appropriate to say “Thank you” in return. It will certainly make the person even happier if you open it in front of him or her.
A: Chinese people paid great attention to gifts. Some people spend a lot of time and effort buying gifts before going abroad.
B: This is very different from the West. Before each public holiday, you can find a very large variety of gifts on display at supermarkets. They are very well wrapped and are inexpensive to buy. Most of the gifts are items for daily use. This saves people a lot of time looking for appropriate holiday gifts. On the other hand, a Chinese person seeks a gift which is decently priced, well-wrapped and has some unique meaning. It is always a challenge to buy a gift for a Chinese person. When people buy gifts for the overseas trips, they usually choose items with Chinese features, such as Beijing opera masks, fans and knots.
A: As more and more Chinese people go abroad, an oversupply of Chinese gifts has occurred in many countries, Chinese gift items are not that unique anymore. A friend of mine is a university professor in United States. She told me that at the end of the semester, she received three Beijing opera masks from her Chinese students. I also heard the Chinese fans are all over the place in Mexico.
B: What is an appropriate gift for a Westerner?
A: Flowers、wine and chocolate are the three universal gifts that is suitable for all purposes. I sometimes wonder whether the Chinese saying “A gift may be insignificant, but it carries tremendous friendship” originated in the West.